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Side-Talks With Girls

July 21st, 2010

And now, direct from 1897, it’s time for…

Today’s missive comes from a reader who wishes to remain anonymous.

Dear Ruth,

I’m engaged to this guy. Let’s call him “John Smith.” He was asking me what kind of wedding ring I wanted, and I told him I wanted a big gold skull ring with “LUCKY” engraved on it and one diamond eye and one ruby eye, and he said that you had written that such rings were gauche, and I said I didn’t care what some old harridan wrote, and he said that proper girls didn’t say such things, and one thing led to another and the next thing you know he had left in a huff and I was revenge-schtupping his brother. Which was great, by the way.

He seems to put a lot of stock in your opinion, so my question is, if I’m writing “John” a letter telling him to take a long walk off a short pier, what’s the right way to do it?

Sincerely,
Etiquette Queen

Thanks, Ruth! See you tomorrow!

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  1. July 21st, 2010 at 20:29 | #1

    lol XD

    Good ol’ revenge-schtupping!

  2. Anonymous
    July 22nd, 2010 at 12:23 | #2

    dear john

    Thanks for starting the morning with a chuckle;.

  3. July 22nd, 2010 at 12:57 | #3

    *howling*

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