Kiss My Knits!

Let’s say you’re out and about, and you see someone engaging in the activity pictured at the right. Maybe you haven’t seen someone do that before. Maybe your grandmother used to do this a lot, and you want to talk to me about it (I get this a lot). Maybe you want to learn how but don’t think you’ve got the patience (that comes up a lot too). What’s the first question you ask? If you’re like some idiots, it’s this:

“Did you crochet that whole thing?”

Buh… I… whu…

I don’t mind that they called it crochet. Most people don’t know one needlecraft from another, so that’s not a big deal. It’s the second part. Did I do the whole thing?

No. I did not do the whole thing. In fact, I mail ordered 2/3 of a completed sock and walk around pretending to knit it so that I can impress people. Now that you’ve seen through my cunning ruse, I’ll have to send off for something else. Maybe a half a tapestry.

The other part of that is that it’s a little insulting. I can hear the “all by yourself?” on the end of it. As if somehow it’s beyond human comprehension that little old me could have completed this eighth wonder of the world.

Of course, given the number of people who see me knit the Jayne hat over and over and think I’m working on the EXACT SAME HAT every single time they see me, for months on end, maybe that’s not such a crazy idea.

Of course, I just smile and answer their questions, because anytime you knit in public, you’re like an ambassador from the magical land of Yarnia. You want to put your best foot forward in case someone ever decides to visit. Secretly, of course, you can wish that some people would just stay home.