Kiss My Knits!

Some of you may have gathered that I’m fat. It drives my mother nuts when I say that I’m fat, so I apologize for upsetting her. I don’t say it to be derogatory to myself, because I know I’m a good person with many fine qualities. No self-worth problems here. I say “fat” to call a spade a spade. I’m a good 30 pounds over what I would consider a healthy weight for me. I believe the technical term for that is “fat.” It’s not healthy.

I mentioned that my husband bought a rather expensive bike a while back. He’s been riding it faithfully, and you know what? It’s paying off! He’s down 13 pounds and has clearly put some muscle on his legs. He had to dig some old “skinny” shorts out of the bottom of a drawer yesterday. If this keeps up, I can see I’m going to have to go shopping for some new clothes for him.

That’s him with the dark hair on the right, next to his buddy (the guy married to my friend, whom I mentioned yesterday is moving down here). His buddy has also lost what I believe is called “a crapload” of weight. And his wife, my dear friend, has also dropped significantly, and is now thinner than she was in college. She looks very healthy and happy.

I, meanwhile, have dropped down just below the low end of the normal range of my weight for the last two years. I’ve also lost a point of body fat. And I’ve just… stayed there. I think this is mainly because I get bored just walking, and I’m not getting enough sleep, which means I want to eat more during the day and have less motivation to get out and exercise anyway. My husband is NOT pressuring me to lose weight AT ALL, I want to make that clear. But I think since he’s got this cool new hobby, he would love it if he could share it with me. So yesterday, after having him check my bike to see if it was in good working order, I dug out my helmet and took a ride.

We live on a hilly street. This is a view looking from the end of our street back towards our house. That hill actually extends a little further on both sides than the picture shows. I swear to you, it’s steeper and longer than it looks.

After my little ride, I now call this hill “Mt. Doom.” I’m fairly sure that I passed a hobbit carrying a ring as I whizzed down the hill. Actually, it was whizzing down the hill that showed my first problem – my helmet was too loose. With every bump, it slid further down the back of my head. I thought I had it tightened enough, but either I didn’t, or my head shrank. I was questioning my sanity as I sped at Mach 5 down the hill with my helmet falling off, so I’m thinking the “head shrinking” theory isn’t as crazy as it sounds.

With one hand braking heavily and the other occasionally repositioning my helmet, I wasn’t exactly channeling Lance Armstrong. I turned down a side street in an effort to avoid the second half of the Valley of Death. I was doing all right until the return trip. I decided there was no shame in walking the bike back up Mt. Doom. When I got off the bike, I realized just how sore my thighs were. I was walking on octopus legs. I trudged along for a while, then got back on at the top of a gentle rise and went back to the main road, where I nearly face-planted into a telephone pole. Of course there was a woman pushing a stroller there to see this. Perfect.

I finally made it home. Here I am, red faced, helmet askew, legs burning. Did I feel a sense of accomplishment? Yes. Did I feel like I wanted to die? Also yes. I love my husband, but I’m not ready to participate in his activity, especially not on the slopes of Mt. Doom.

However, what I do like to do is run. Of course, I haven’t done this in four years, so perhaps that should be in the past tense. I’d been looking at getting back into it again, and one program that looked good was the Couch to 5k program. Down side of this program: you have to keep track of how many minutes you’ve been walking, how many minutes you’ve been running, etc., since it’s in intervals. I don’t even own a watch. Enter ! She posted about a podcast that Robert Ullrey put together where he tells you at what point to start running or walking, so you don’t have to check your time, you just follow the verbal cues he’s put into the music. I may not own a watch, but I do own an iPod!

This morning, I did the week one program, and it’s perfect for me. This was a challenge. I was even more red-faced at the end, drenched in sweat, and regretting that I’d worn a white shirt. Also, that extra fat I mentioned meant that I had a bit more jiggling around during while running than was strictly comfortable, but who cares? I was able to do the whole 30-minute podcast.

This is the one for me. I’m thinking I’ll take 18 weeks instead of the recommended nine, because, see above re. being out of shape. I don’t care if I ever run a 5k, I’m just enjoying the program so far. This is very exciting. I feel fantastic, and that’s always a great way to feel.