Kiss My Knits!

After the usual “okay, who’s in the lead now?” chaos, we get rolling. Walking along, minding our own business, we spot some slime. Moving slime. Instantly the decision is made to douse it in oil and set it on fire. Our rogue throws oil at the slime, but misses spectacularly and soaks the Dwarf leading the charge. Looks like the burning starts early tonight!

While the Dwarf steps to the side to clean off the oil, a slime gets the drop on us. You heard me. A slime gets the drop on us. It burns our wizard with acid. Disgusting AND deadly! The rest of us flail ineffectually, but the wizard casts burning hands on it and it shrivels like a magical acidic salted slug.

Wizard Veracity: “Fire is our friend. For once.”

Unfortunately, another slime and an ochre jelly arrive. Our Dwarf splits the jelly in half. Artist’s rendition at right.

We attempted to flambe, puree, and otherwise pound the jelly into… well, into jelly. One of them spat acid at me, but thanks to the chainmail of acid resistance I got last time, I took minimal damage and looked quite stylish doing it! My turn came around again. I realized that I had no blunt weapons, no method of setting things afire, so rather than dicker around too much and lose my turn I said “ah, screw it” and sliced through the slime. The acidic slime. My axe was partially corroded. Great.

The other Dwarf, Torkal, has a stroke of genius, drops his axe, and pulls a crowbar out of his pack. Yes, he travels with a crowbar. We are all impressed and the GM has to look stuff up. Sadly, the crowbar misses. The jelly oozes over to the axe that the Dwarf dropped and…

GM: Jelly hovers over Torkal’s axe and begins to dissolve it.
Dwarf: I think I just raged.
Bard: Slurp slurp
Cleric: eeee!
Me: NOT COOL.
Wizard: rofl – man, (GM), you are so evil.
GM: actions have consequences!

CRUEL. CRUEL!!

Eventually all the jellies are reduced to a a fine paste. Veracity burns quite a few, and I crush the final one beneath my boot. Good riddance.

We continue along the passage, coming upon two kobolds on either side of a large alarm gong. We debate what to do. Possibilities include:

• Throwing the dead burnt bat from several adventures ago into the hall. Or maybe flap its wings around a corner. When one kobold goes to investigate, ambush him and try somehow to kill the other. Our wizard argues against this because she’s abnormally fond of the bat and hopes to raise it from the dead at some point.

  Dwarf: Torkal slowly lowers his face into his hands. He goes quiet as his companions talk.

• Throw a dead slime at the gong and/or the kobolds to eat away at everything. Down side: someone has to pick up and throw a dead slime. Also, our aim really sucks.

  Dwarf: Torkal grabs a small rock.

• Someone play possum to try to get them away from the gong, which won’t be suspicious AT ALL.

  Dwarf: “You all have exactly one minute before I throw this rock. Do something. I no longer care what.”

Man, one little axe gets eaten and it screws up your whole day. Okay, okay. Our bard attempts to fascinate the kobolds. It goes badly. The gong is sounded. We rush after a fleeing kobold, straight into an arrow trap. Most of us are skewered to varying degrees. After taking a moment to bind our wounds, we stumble upon an abandoned jail where our Elf finds a key and nothing else. We’ve lost valuable time and the kobold has surely reached reached whatever its destination was.

We pony up and continue down the corridor, coming to a big chamber. Our rogue Val pokes his head in.

Val: I see a number of kobolds…they are performing some sort of ritual.. There are a bunch of altars with corpses…but one…one has something still moving on it.

I don’t know about you, but that sounds dangerous to me. This was going to be a major encounter, and as much as I wanted to continue, I had to have my daughter at school in less than eight hours. We decided to call it a night. Next week we’ll jump right in with immediate mayhem and destruction. Woo!